Shame vs. Humiliation — What's the Difference?
By Urooj Arif & Fiza Rafique — Updated on March 30, 2024
Shame is an internal feeling of guilt or inadequacy, while humiliation involves being lowered in dignity or pride, often due to external circumstances.
Difference Between Shame and Humiliation
Table of Contents
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Key Differences
Shame is a deeply personal emotion that stems from a sense of failure or wrongdoing against one's own values or societal norms. It is an internal experience, often not visible to others, that can lead to a feeling of worthlessness or being flawed. Humiliation, on the other hand, is an emotion triggered by an external event in which one's dignity or pride is attacked or diminished, usually in the presence of others. It involves a loss of respect or esteem from oneself or others.
While shame is about how one perceives oneself, humiliation is about how others perceive or treat one. Shame can be a private matter, experienced even when no one else is aware of the perceived failure or inadequacy. Humiliation, however, usually involves an audience, whether real or imagined, and is often inflicted by someone else, making it a more public experience.
The sources of shame and humiliation can differ significantly. Shame may arise from not meeting one's own standards or values, regardless of others' opinions. Humiliation often results from an act of disrespect or degradation by others, focusing on the loss of status or respect in the eyes of others.
The impact of shame and humiliation can vary. Shame can lead to introspection and personal growth if managed healthily, encouraging individuals to align closer with their values. Humiliation, particularly when it is severe and public, can have more damaging effects on self-esteem and mental health, sometimes leading to anger, resentment, or a desire for revenge.
Both shame and humiliation can serve social functions, but they operate differently. Shame can regulate social behavior by internalizing social norms and values. Humiliation, by contrast, can enforce social hierarchy by demonstrating power dynamics, often in a way that is considered unjust or abusive by the victim.
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Comparison Chart
Source
Internal perception of failure
External event causing loss of dignity
Visibility
Private, internal feeling
Often public, involves an audience
Trigger
Personal standards or values
Actions of others or external circumstances
Impact on Self
Can lead to introspection and growth
Often results in damage to self-esteem and mental health
Social Function
Regulates behavior through internalization of norms
Enforces social hierarchy, demonstrating power dynamics
Compare with Definitions
Shame
A painful feeling of humiliation or distress caused by consciousness of wrong or foolish behavior.
He felt a deep sense of shame after lying to his friends.
Humiliation
Can lead to feelings of anger and a desire for revenge.
She harbored feelings of humiliation and anger towards those who mocked her.
Shame
Associated with guilt, embarrassment, and remorse.
The incident left him with a lingering shame that overshadowed his achievements.
Humiliation
The action of humiliating someone or the state of being humiliated.
The public criticism was a bitter humiliation for the company.
Shame
An internal condition of being dishonored or disgraced.
She carried the shame of the scandal for years.
Humiliation
A lowering of pride or dignity, often in front of others.
He considered his demotion a severe humiliation.
Shame
A self-conscious emotion reflecting a decrease in one's sense of worth.
The shame from his mistakes made him reluctant to face his family.
Humiliation
An external event that causes a person to feel ashamed or lost in status.
The leaked emails were a source of great humiliation to the politician.
Shame
A motivator for personal reflection and change.
She used her feelings of shame as a catalyst for personal growth.
Humiliation
Often involves an imbalance of power.
The boss's harsh rebuke was not just criticism but a humiliation in front of her colleagues.
Shame
Shame is an unpleasant self-conscious emotion typically associated with a negative evaluation of the self; withdrawal motivations; and feelings of distress, exposure, mistrust, powerlessness, and worthlessness.
Humiliation
Humiliation is the abasement of pride, which creates mortification or leads to a state of being humbled or reduced to lowliness or submission. It is an emotion felt by a person whose social status, either by force or willingly, has just decreased.
Shame
A painful emotion caused by the belief that one is, or is perceived by others to be, inferior or unworthy of affection or respect because of one's actions, thoughts, circumstances, or experiences
Felt shame for having dropped out of school.
Humiliation
The act of humiliating; degradation.
Shame
Respect for propriety or morality
Have you no shame?.
Humiliation
The state of being humiliated or disgraced; shame.
Shame
A condition of disgrace or dishonor; ignominy
An act that brought shame on the whole family.
Humiliation
A humiliating condition or circumstance.
Shame
A regrettable or unfortunate situation
"It was a shame how the place had fallen apart, with tall scorched grass and sagging gutters" (Tom Drury).
Humiliation
The act of humiliating or humbling someone; abasement of pride; mortification.
Shame
One that brings dishonor, disgrace, or condemnation
"I would ... Forget the shames that you have stained me with" (Shakespeare).
Humiliation
The state of being humiliated, humbled or reduced to lowliness or submission.
Shame
To cause to feel shame
"expletives that would have shamed a stevedore" (Jeffrey Tayler).
Humiliation
The act of humiliating or humbling; abasement of pride; mortification.
Shame
To cause to feel ashamed to the point of doing something
I was shamed into making an apology.
Humiliation
The state of being humiliated, humbled, or reduced to lowliness or submission.
The former was a humiliation of Deity; the latter a humiliation of manhood.
Shame
To bring dishonor or disgrace on
Behavior that shamed him in the eyes of the community.
Humiliation
State of disgrace or loss of self-respect
Shame
To disgrace by surpassing
Wanted revenge because a rival had shamed him in the previous race.
Humiliation
Strong feelings of embarrassment
Shame
Uncomfortable or painful feeling due to recognition or consciousness of one's own impropriety or dishonor, or something being exposed that should have been kept private.
When I realized that I had hurt my friend, I felt deep shame.
The teenager couldn’t bear the shame of introducing his parents.
Humiliation
An instance in which you are caused to lose your prestige or self-respect;
He had to undergo one humiliation after another
Shame
Something to regret.
It was a shame not to see the show after driving all that way.
Humiliation
Depriving one of self-esteem
Shame
Reproach incurred or suffered; dishonour; ignominy; derision.
Shame
The cause or reason of shame; that which brings reproach and ignominy.
Shame
That which is shameful and private, especially private parts.
Shame
The capacity to be ashamed, inhibiting one from brazen behaviour; due regard for one's own moral conduct and how one is perceived by others; restraint, moderation, decency.
Don't you have any shame?
Shame
A cry of admonition for the subject of a speech, either to denounce the speaker or to agree with the speaker's denunciation of some person or matter; often used reduplicated, especially in political debates.
Shame
(South Africa) Expressing sympathy.
Shame, you poor thing, you must be cold!
Shame
(transitive) To cause to feel shame.
I was shamed by the teacher's public disapproval.
Shame
(transitive) To cover with reproach or ignominy; to denounce as having done something shameful; to dishonor; to disgrace.
Shame
(transitive) To drive or compel by shame.
The politician was shamed into resigning.
Shame
To feel shame, be ashamed.
Shame
To mock at; to deride.
Shame
A painful sensation excited by a consciousness of guilt or impropriety, or of having done something which injures reputation, or of the exposure of that which nature or modesty prompts us to conceal.
HIde, for shame,Romans, your grandsires' images,That blush at their degenerate progeny.
Have you no modesty, no maiden shame?
Shame
Reproach incurred or suffered; dishonor; ignominy; derision; contempt.
Ye have borne the shame of the heathen.
Honor and shame from no condition rise.
And every woe a tear can claimExcept an erring sister's shame.
Shame
The cause or reason of shame; that which brings reproach, and degrades a person in the estimation of others; disgrace.
O C sar, what a wounding shame is this!
Guides who are the shame of religion.
Shame
The parts which modesty requires to be covered; the private parts.
Shame
To make ashamed; to excite in (a person) a comsciousness of guilt or impropriety, or of conduct derogatory to reputation; to put to shame.
Were there but one righteous in the world, he would . . . shame the world, and not the world him.
Shame
To cover with reproach or ignominy; to dishonor; to disgrace.
And with foul cowardice his carcass shame.
Shame
To mock at; to deride.
Ye have shamed the counsel of the poor.
Shame
To be ashamed; to feel shame.
I do shameTo think of what a noble strain you are.
Shame
A painful emotion resulting from an awareness of inadequacy or guilt
Shame
A state of dishonor;
One mistake brought shame to all his family
Suffered the ignominy of being sent to prison
Shame
An unfortunate development;
It's a pity he couldn't do it
Shame
Bring shame or dishonor upon;
He dishonored his family by committing a serious crime
Shame
Compel through a sense of shame;
She shamed him into making amends
Shame
Cause to be ashamed
Shame
Surpass or beat by a wide margin
Common Curiosities
Can shame be experienced without humiliation?
Yes, shame can be experienced privately without any external act of humiliation.
Is humiliation always intentional?
Not always; however, it often involves actions by others that result in a person feeling degraded.
How can one recover from shame or humiliation?
Recovery can involve self-compassion, understanding the context, seeking support, and sometimes confronting the source or cause.
Can humiliation have any positive outcomes?
While it's generally seen as damaging, some may use the experience of humiliation as a catalyst for change or as a lesson in resilience.
Do shame and humiliation affect mental health?
Yes, both can have profound effects on mental health, potentially leading to issues like depression or anxiety if not addressed.
How do cultures vary in their perception of shame and humiliation?
Cultural norms and values greatly influence how shame and humiliation are perceived, experienced, and expressed.
What is the key difference between shame and humiliation?
Shame is an internal feeling related to personal standards, while humiliation is caused by external events affecting dignity.
What strategies can help in managing humiliation?
Strategies include re-framing the experience, focusing on recovery and resilience, and seeking supportive relationships.
Can public figures experience shame and humiliation differently?
Public figures might experience these emotions more intensely due to their visibility, with humiliation often occurring in a very public context.
Is there a way to prevent feeling shame or humiliation?
While not all situations can be avoided, fostering self-esteem, resilience, and a supportive environment can mitigate these feelings.
How do shame and humiliation play a role in social dynamics?
They can reinforce or challenge social norms, hierarchies, and power dynamics, affecting group cohesion and individual status.
Are there any therapeutic approaches to dealing with shame?
Cognitive behavioral therapy (CBT), compassion-focused therapy, and narrative therapy are among approaches to help individuals cope with shame.
Is there a difference in how shame and humiliation are remembered?
Yes, humiliating experiences, especially those that are public, may be more vividly remembered and have a lasting impact due to their external nature and social implications.
How does social media impact experiences of shame and humiliation?
Social media can amplify these experiences by increasing their visibility, scope, and the speed with which they spread.
Can shame be a constructive emotion?
Yes, when it leads to self-reflection and a commitment to align actions with personal or societal values.
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Written by
Urooj ArifUrooj is a skilled content writer at Ask Difference, known for her exceptional ability to simplify complex topics into engaging and informative content. With a passion for research and a flair for clear, concise writing, she consistently delivers articles that resonate with our diverse audience.
Co-written by
Fiza RafiqueFiza Rafique is a skilled content writer at AskDifference.com, where she meticulously refines and enhances written pieces. Drawing from her vast editorial expertise, Fiza ensures clarity, accuracy, and precision in every article. Passionate about language, she continually seeks to elevate the quality of content for readers worldwide.
