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Decorum vs. Etiquette — What's the Difference?

By Tayyaba Rehman & Maham Liaqat — Updated on April 3, 2024
Decorum involves behavior in keeping with good taste and propriety, while etiquette refers to the customary code of polite behavior in society or among members of a particular profession or group.
Decorum vs. Etiquette — What's the Difference?

Difference Between Decorum and Etiquette

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Key Differences

Decorum is the broader concept of behavior that is considered proper and in good taste within a given context, focusing on the appropriateness and respectfulness of actions or conduct. Etiquette, on the other hand, is more specific, detailing the expected behaviors and manners in specific situations, such as dining etiquette or business meeting protocols.
While decorum encompasses the general demeanor and comportment expected in societal or professional settings, implying a sense of dignity and respect, etiquette provides the rules and guidelines for specific actions, such as how to address people of different social standings, the proper way to eat certain foods, or how to behave at specific types of events.
Decorum is often associated with the overall impression one makes through their actions and presence in various social or professional environments. It requires an understanding of what is considered respectful and appropriate in different contexts. Etiquette, whereas, involves adhering to a set of prescribed practices and rituals, which can vary widely between cultures, traditions, and settings.
Understanding decorum is about grasping the essence of behaving in a manner that aligns with the expectations of a particular society or setting, often governed by unwritten rules about decency and appropriateness. Etiquette, on the other hand, can often be learned through explicit instructions, books, or guides that outline the do's and don'ts in specific social or professional scenarios.
The observance of decorum helps maintain a harmonious and respectful atmosphere in any setting, reflecting an individual's ability to adapt their behavior to the expectations of others. Etiquette, while, serves as a tool to navigate the complexities of social interactions, ensuring smooth and polite communication and conduct among individuals.
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Comparison Chart

Definition

Behavior in keeping with good taste and propriety
Customary code of polite behavior in society or specific groups

Focus

Appropriateness and respectfulness of conduct
Specific behaviors and manners in certain situations

Application

General demeanor in societal or professional settings
Prescribed practices in specific contexts

Basis

Unwritten rules about decency
Often learned through explicit instructions

Purpose

Maintains harmony and respect
Facilitates smooth social interactions

Compare with Definitions

Decorum

Respectfulness in actions or conduct.
Decorum demands that one should not speak ill of the absent.

Etiquette

Protocols for actions in specific situations.
Business etiquette varies from one country to another.

Decorum

The propriety of conduct.
She handled the situation with perfect decorum.

Etiquette

The customary code of polite behavior.
Etiquette dictates that we stand when a guest arrives.

Decorum

Adherence to societal norms of behavior.
They showed great decorum during the solemn event.

Etiquette

Guidelines for manners and courtesy.
He was well-versed in the etiquette of diplomatic receptions.

Decorum

Behavior in keeping with good taste.
His speech maintained decorum despite the provocation.

Etiquette

The practice of polite behavior in society.
She taught her children the importance of good etiquette.

Decorum

The quality of being proper and dignified.
The ceremony was conducted with due decorum.

Etiquette

Rules governing socially acceptable behavior.
Understanding dining etiquette is essential at formal dinners.

Decorum

Decorum (from the Latin: "right, proper") was a principle of classical rhetoric, poetry and theatrical theory concerning the fitness or otherwise of a style to a theatrical subject. The concept of decorum is also applied to prescribed limits of appropriate social behavior within set situations.

Etiquette

Etiquette ( and ; French: [e.ti.kɛt]) is the set of conventional rules of personal behaviour in polite society, usually in the form of an ethical code that delineates the expected and accepted social behaviours that accord with the conventions and norms observed by a society, a social class, or a social group. In modern English usage, the French word étiquette (ticket) dates from the year 1750.

Decorum

Appropriateness of behavior or conduct; propriety
"In the Ireland of the 1940's ... the stolidity of a long, empty, grave face was thought to be the height of decorum and profundity" (John McGahern).

Etiquette

The customary code of polite behaviour in society or among members of a particular profession or group
The rules of etiquette are changing
Court etiquette was now familiar to Joan
Etiquette books

Decorum

Decorums The conventions or requirements of polite behavior
The formalities and decorums of a military funeral.

Etiquette

The practices and forms prescribed by social convention or by authority.

Decorum

The appropriateness of an element of an artistic or literary work, such as style or tone, to its particular circumstance or to the composition as a whole.

Etiquette

The forms required by a good upbringing, or prescribed by authority, to be observed in social or official life; observance of the proprieties of rank and occasion; conventional decorum; ceremonial code of polite society.

Decorum

(uncountable) Appropriate social behavior.

Etiquette

The customary behavior of members of a profession, business, law, or sports team towards each other.

Decorum

(countable) A convention of social behavior.

Etiquette

A label used to indicate that a letter is to be sent by airmail.

Decorum

Propriety of manner or conduct; grace arising from suitableness of speech and behavior to one's own character, or to the place and occasion; decency of conduct; seemliness; that which is seemly or suitable.
Negligent of the duties and decorums of his station.
If your masterWould have a queen his beggar, you must tell him,That majesty, to keep decorum, mustNo less beg than a kingdom.

Etiquette

The forms required by good breeding, or prescribed by authority, to be observed in social or official life; observance of the proprieties of rank and occasion; conventional decorum; ceremonial code of polite society.
The pompous etiquette to the court of Louis the Fourteenth.

Decorum

Propriety in manners and conduct

Etiquette

Rules governing socially acceptable behavior

Common Curiosities

Why is decorum important?

Decorum is important because it helps maintain a respectful and harmonious atmosphere, ensuring that behavior is aligned with societal expectations.

What is the main difference between decorum and etiquette?

Decorum refers to behavior that is appropriate and in good taste, while etiquette is about the specific codes of polite behavior in society.

How can someone learn etiquette?

Etiquette can be learned through guides, classes, or observing and mimicking socially acceptable behavior in specific contexts.

Are there penalties for breaking etiquette?

While not legal penalties, breaking etiquette can lead to social disapproval, embarrassment, or damage to one’s reputation.

Can good decorum make up for lack of etiquette?

Good decorum, indicating respectfulness and appropriateness, can often compensate for minor lapses in specific etiquette rules.

Does etiquette change over time?

Yes, etiquette can evolve with society, reflecting changes in values, norms, and cultural practices.

Can etiquette vary between cultures?

Yes, etiquette can vary significantly between cultures, reflecting different traditions and social norms.

Is it possible to have good etiquette but poor decorum?

Yes, one can follow specific etiquette rules while still behaving in a manner that is overall inappropriate for the situation.

Is decorum always related to formal settings?

Not necessarily; decorum applies to both formal and informal settings, emphasizing behavior that is appropriate to the context.

Does etiquette apply to online interactions?

Yes, there is a growing emphasis on netiquette, or internet etiquette, governing behavior in online communications and interactions.

How does one know what decorum to follow in a new setting?

Observing others, asking questions, and being mindful of the context can help one adapt to the expected decorum in a new setting.

Can anyone learn etiquette?

Yes, etiquette can be learned by anyone willing to study and practice the specific codes of behavior relevant to their social or professional context.

Is decorum innate or learned?

Decorum is largely learned, developed through socialization and understanding societal norms and expectations.

How important is etiquette in professional settings?

Etiquette is crucial in professional settings as it facilitates respectful and efficient interactions, reflecting well on one’s professionalism.

What role does etiquette play in international diplomacy?

Etiquette plays a fundamental role in diplomacy, helping to ensure respectful and smooth interactions across cultural and political divides.

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Author Spotlight

Written by
Tayyaba Rehman
Tayyaba Rehman is a distinguished writer, currently serving as a primary contributor to askdifference.com. As a researcher in semantics and etymology, Tayyaba's passion for the complexity of languages and their distinctions has found a perfect home on the platform. Tayyaba delves into the intricacies of language, distinguishing between commonly confused words and phrases, thereby providing clarity for readers worldwide.
Co-written by
Maham Liaqat

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